Social Media is a Farce

Just the other day a friend took a selfie while we were at Charlie Bistro, a pal commented on the pic “aaaahh! Elvis, you must be living large nowadays, you seem to have your life in perfect order.”  It got me thinking a lot about social media, and how this plays a part in creating a certain life that seems perfect from the outside. Just like my friend, I have also been a victim of social media envy, I remember sometime back I was not working for about a month, I was so broke, all I did was chill in the house, read books and browse as I kept looking for a job.

 

I would wander to social media particularly Instagram and Facebook, all I could see were other people having fun,  from the pictures. This would really depress me until the next day one of them would call asking me for a loan, and I would wonder, weren’t you the guy who was just sky diving in Malindi just the other day.

“An open Facebook page is simply a psychiatric dry erase board that screams, “Look at me. I am insecure. I need your reaction to what I am doing, but you’re not cool enough to be my friend. Therefore, I will just pray you see this because the approval of God is not all I need.”
― Shannon L. Alder

Social media has also created a fallacy, a fake life that almost everyone is showcasing. A scroll down my Facebook timeline, a quick glance of profile photos on my contacts on WhatsApp or WhatsApp statuses, and Instagram pics all portray a rich lifestyle of all my contacts. Photos were taken at exclusive posh areas, near high-end malls, at expensive joints, near posh cars, etc. In fact, all if not 97% of my contacts on all social media platforms are very rich and wealthy if you go by the lifestyle they portray

“It amazes me that we are all on Twitter and Facebook. By “we” I mean adults. We’re adults, right? But emotionally we’re a culture of seven-year-olds. Have you ever had that moment when are you updating your status and you realize that every status update is just a variation on a single request: “Would someone please acknowledge me?”
― Marc Maron

Many of us are posting the highlight reel of our lives — it’s easier to post a photo of our double Mocha at Java with those big samosas they have than to admit that we’ve struggled that day. Or, share a status about how we’ve failed. Or, that maybe our lives don’t look quite as put together without a filter on.

When you are about to post on Facebook, about, let’s say some good career-related news or some achievement, ask yourself is it out of vanity? Is it because you want the likes? the messages of congratulations? and perhaps, if you’re brutally honest, you want others to know you are doing well. News that is quite personal, do we need to make it so public?

“A fixation with connecting with ‘friends’ online comes with the risk of disconnection with friends waiting for you to be present in the offline world.”
― Craig Hodges

Essena O’Neill had a picture-perfect life. she had over 800,000 followers on Instagram and a lucrative career as a social media model. On November 2, she blew that reality to bits. In a YouTube video, O’Neill tearfully explained that while she had enjoyed a “perfect life” she was depressed because it had no purpose. She deleted both her YouTube channel and Instagram account, and declared that “Social media, especially how I used it, isn’t real.”

These are some of the pictures below taken before she deleted her social media accounts, in the picture she explains how fake the pictures  were below ;

 

“You are what you share.”
― Charles Leadbeater

Social media is a marketing platform where potential employers exist. A quick look at your tweets and posts will tell employers whether you are the employee they need or not. Remember you are a brand, social media should not change that, live the true you, social media high-end lifestyle showcase, leave it to socialites who must do so to attract customers at a high fee. Whom are you attracting with a high-end fake lifestyle when you are jobless and have siblings and family that is looking up to for assistance, yet you are a graduate who is still jobless?

Each time you create a tweet or post for any of your social media platforms, remember you are a brand and people will judge you by what you post, the kind of lifestyle you portray and this will have a great impact in your real life.

“The society is getting addicted to technology, especially social media, quite like one gets addicted to cocaine or pot. And it all works through the neurochemical process of reward and punishment. And furthermore, when a whole world starts functioning driven by this petty instinctual process of reward and punishment, things in existence begin to get really messed up, like it has already started.”

“The more screen-time you consume on your device, the more revenue can the big tech make. So, your health, your wellbeing, your sanity and serenity are nowhere closer to their priorities. That’s why, your health is in your hands, your serenity is in your hands, your sanity is in your hands.”

“Selfies have begun to replace memories – likes and comments have begun to replace lasting conversations – illusive friends and followers lists have begun to replace real reliable friendship. And this is nothing to be taken for granted.”

“Turn off all notifications on your phone, except the most important ones. And check your social media only once or twice a day, not every minute. If you can do this, then perhaps there is a possibility, that society will not completely lose its sanity and health after all.”
― Abhijit Naska

Have you ever posted a happy pic online to mask your real-life suffering? Remember, don’t allow likes, comments, shares, retweets, favorites define who you are!!

 

My 2 Cents on Work-Life Balance

Work-life balance is non-existent, there is nothing like work-life balance, it does not exist, it’s a myth, Work-Life balance is BS. If you love what you do, you don’t work a day in your life.

“There is no such thing as work-life balance. Everything worth fighting for unbalances your life.”
― Alain de Botton

I think that like any other aspect, work is also part of your life and like everything in life the trick is finding a rhythm and equilibrium, that would suit your needs best.

Most of us work because we want to support ourselves, our families and the people around us, in the ideal world we all want to be doing work that we love, are passionate about, fulfilling work, work that’s provides us with meaning and passion. But still, if your work is not providing you with joy every day you have to understand that working is what each of us does and it’s the contribution we make to society.

If you have a job that’s challenging and you’re passionate about, you tend not to feel resentful of its demands because you understand that it’s working for you, too

“Imagine life as a game in which you are juggling some five balls in the air. You name them — work, family, health, friends and spirit and you’re keeping all of these in the air. You will soon understand that work is a rubber ball. If you drop it, it will bounce back. But the other four balls — family, health, friends, and spirit — are made of glass. If you drop one of these, they will be irrevocably scuffed, marked, nicked, damaged, or even shattered. They will never be the same. You must understand that and strive for balance in your life.” ―Brian Dyson, former vice chairman and COO of Coca-Cola

We should think of work as part of a full life and a holistic experience, it becomes easier to see that success in one aspect often supports another. Even in the Bible Deuteronomy Chapter 3 talks about the different seasons in life, let me quote the Verse I like how its correlates with what I am writing.

Verse 22 says ‘’ Wherefore I perceive that there is nothing better than that a man should rejoice in his own works; for that is his portion; for who shall bring him to see what shall be after him? 

So “You can have it all, just not all at once.”  Just like in Deuteronomy chapter 3; there are seasons of life where you will find that you have less time for yourself and will devote more to school or family or work. This is part of the normal ebb and flow of life.

When you think big and expect that you can have a positive experience with all that work and life have to offer, you’ll be more likely to make that happen.

Maybe we should bury “work-life balance” and think bigger and better about work-life fulfillment to do a little less balancing and a lot more living.

 

 

 

The curious case of persistence

Wouldn’t be nice, if all your wishes were granted, for example, if you wanted to be rich all you were required to say is some magical words and alaas !! you would find yourself in your own private island with all the material possession’s you have ever dreamt of ,well if wishes were “nduthis” …

The truth of the matter is that you have to work hard to achieve whatever you set your mind to achieve, we know that in life there are people who have worked hard but they have nothing to show for all their hard work, and we have other individuals who have not put any effort, but as luck would have it they have really reaped where they have not sown.

When it comes to Jobs we have people who have tarmacked for years and we also have people who are moving from one job to another, we also have people who quit their jobs, yet we still have people who would die to have those jobs.

 

Because of all these things that happen people end up comparing themselves, especially with people on social media, you see people who seem to be very happy, going on vacations, happy couples sharing their pictures daily, your former classmate sharing a picture with his new car they have bought, etc. Yet things are not working out for you.  Maybe it’s true these people are happy and successful, but you see, the thing is don’t be discouraged, keep motivating yourself, work hard, persistence really pays a lot.

For example I did not have an idea on what to write today in my blog post, but I have just written something, I know it may make no sense but you get my point- You see what I did there.  I will pen off with a few quotes and thoughts from Good reads …

“I watched a squirrel fall from a rather high branch. Upon hitting the ground, he bounced slightly, paused, shook himself vigorously and then immediately scampered back up to the very same place on the very same branch from which he’d fallen. There are some that might call that stupidity. Then there are others like myself who would call that tenacity. And while I generally have no interest in being a squirrel, in this particular respect I wouldn’t mind being like one.”

“If there is anything I’ve learned the last year it is the importance of being clear on what you want. I spent the better part of last year just figuring out what I actually want with my life. What I want to have around me, how I want to spend my days, the people I want in my life, what I want to create, why it’s important to me and most importantly who I need to be in order to create that life for myself. Who do I need to be to have that career I’m dreaming of? When you can see the highest version of yourself crystal clear you will wake up each day striving to walk in new ways. You see that future YOU as a role model and you are filled with energy to grow and level up and take that place. If you want a change, you really do need to let go of how you have done things in the past. It’s the most exciting feeling, stepping into that future vision of myself, a little bit every day.”
― Charlotte Eriksson